Went & did extensive but relatively light grocery shopping, found baby bananas, went for nice Korean. That place (Gohyang on 9 in Hadley) is amazingly consistent & nice, makes me happy knowing it's there even when I don't have time to go.

Did the work I needed to do, made dry rub, rubbed it into ribs of happy pigs, made pumpkin stuffing (onion, pumpkin, couscous, almonds, currants, curry powder, cinnamon, cayenne, queen of spices, etc.). Waiting for that to cool, then I'll put it away. Lying in a pile with Peretz, he'll need another walk in a bit, I think.

Waves of panic hit me when I least expect them, like a physical blow, something I need to live with, so I do.

Very tired, settling into couch, heart racing.