Driving to the airport in the heavy fog, in my head: having been the mechanism by which someone I love found a more radical means of self destruction than suicide is no picnic, find it unbearable much of the time; at the same time realize that I should be happy to have helped her do something she wanted to do, no matter how stupid I think it is, and oddly, I sometimes am. In my heart: systole, pain; diastole, nothing- prefer the pain, frankly, easier to ignore things that actually exist.
Anyway, caricature, esoteric humor, irony, true enough for all that.
Last bit of the drive, tailgated by BMW with high beams on, the bastard.
T's plane was early, but not as early as claimed, spent some time bored in the airport, taking photographs, getting dirty looks. Not sure how much of that was people's uncanny hostility to public photography, how much the Tinkerbell hat.
T finally arrived, lovely to see her, she had brought Camera Lucida along to read, apparently doesn't much care for it. Fetched her luggage, went to car, drove home hearing about emergent issues in brave new life, made an effort to dispense sage advice, ridiculous.
Peretz was strangely agitated by her arrival, kept running down to the basement, returning with bone, going to his bed, running back down to the basement, etc., etc. T was also roaming about, bathroom, examining random objects. Eventually they both settled down & treated one another highly affectionately, took pictures of that too.
We took P for a walk, then I drove T over to her folks' house through more thick fog, deer in the road on the way, turned around confusedly, looked at us, passed a secret sign & was on its way.
Meditating on Lord Ganesh, remover & setter of obstacles. An elephant never forgets.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
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