Watched Star Trek: The Motion Picture then headed over to H & O for special New Years' dinner, was nice until I started feeling shitty again.

Wrapped in blanket, feeling shitty.

Home sick, watching the snow from my bedroom window.

Maybe I'll have a snack.

Got home, let the dogs out & in, collapsed for a few minutes, then went out for some so so Chinese, better than no Chinese at all, but not a patch on the high test stuff on offer to the south.

L. got some spicy maki she wasn't too keen on, dogs gave it five stars.

Collapsing again now.

Coming down with a cold, I think, ugh. Scratchy throat earlier, now sniffles.

Went & got a meatball sub & a Vitamin Water.

Back at work, ugh.

Technical, schmechnical.

Last night, we gave Pete a ride up to Hanover, stopping by the Norwich Inn for delightful beers & tasty food. Was kind of overtired by the time we got home, still not over it.

Finally did some laundry, have been taking Peter around to old haunts, will take him home in a few hours.

Chillier today.

Car repair's underway, center pipe, etc. Also, a mouse apparently chewed through my air filter. Not going to be too expensive, should be done around lunchtime, hurray!

Also got local donuts on way home from shop, double hurray!

Just back from walk with Peter & dogs, been being shown photos of Vanuatu.

Nice having Peter visit, tried to take him to the local hot spots.

Sleepy.

Up early to try to get work out of the way before pal arrives from out of town.

Lovely snow fog.

Dogs started barking violently in the middle of the night for no apparent reason.

Finally got around to festive holiday dinner with latkes & pork tenderloin, yum.

Karen came by, presents were exchanged. Peter's coming to visit tomorrow.

Watching Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.

Rainy, foggy, noisy drive home. Pretty exhausted, leaving exhaust system repair until Monday.

Great to see the pups.

Just boarded ferryboat back from the Vineyard after breakfast with kid.

His gig last night was very enjoyable.

The restaurants here are overpriced & mediocre.

Arriving in Falmouth yesterday, my muffler came detached from my car, removed it & put it in the back. Will get it repaired once back in Greenfield.

Feeling creaky.

One of these days should get a job that doesn't require things like working every day of xmas week.

Happy birthday, Henry, and welcome. 37 is pretty fun.

Guess xmas fun is tiring, extremely tired.

Chinese food was so delightfully filling that we ended up scrapping planned dinner, had some snacks & a bowl of grape nuts.

Watched some Planet of the Apes movies, L.'s still watching one.

Work tomorrow, ugh.

Just tuned the uke I got for L.

We've been watching Planet of the Apes.

I received Dr. Who paraphernalia.

Geeking it out big time, pretty much. Hurray!

Going to go swap backup tapes & get some nice Chinese.

Would've just been woken by the loud thunk of Pickles falling off my bed had I not already been woken by roaring winds.

Need a drink of water.

Happy xmas.

This morning, warmer than the past several, for some reason, both dogs peed copiously on our snowy back porch, ignoring all efforts to dissuade them.

Last night, had a very strong drink at the H & O where we went to visit with a friend of mine who was attending a birthday function.

Xmas plans slowly coming together.

Feet still cold from helping dig L.'s car out this morning, pressing on.

Listening to eponymous Neil Young album that arrived here this morning.

Way too cold out for Peretz, just had trouble relieving himself because one of his hind legs didn't support his weight on the cold, cold snow. Poor Peretz.

In other Hanukkah news, we've ordered a pizza with bacon & hot peppers.

Dreadfully dull day.

Icicles the perfect size for skewering humans dangle with delightful menace from the addition housing the new press.

Snacking on pretzels & candied nuts.

Hit the ground running at work, just taking a little breather.

Accounting Dept., argh.

Argh, argh, argh.

Brunch, Hanukkah ceremonial accomplished.

Brunch was even more delightful than usual,close knit local bunch braving the elements & all that.

Happy solstice.

It's snowing again, seems like it's always snowing. I sit down to write and suddenly, it's so cold.

It's very tempting to write, "From now on in, everything I write will be strictly fictional." Of course, there is no strictly fictional, fiction being a subset of nonfiction & vice versa.

Had some unsettling dreams.

Wonder if the H & O is open for brunch.

Trip to work & back a bit grueling, did manage to find a menorah that'll do until my grandma's arrives.

Back hurts crazily badly, more snow to shovel tomorrow, pretty gleeful about that despite the back thing.

L. made tortilla chips, crunchy, crunchy.

Wonder when I'm going to feel like I've caught up on sleep.

Just did a few household chores, workplace chores on in a bit.

Make a wish.

Happy about the coming snowy solstice.

Cake & ice cream, cake & ice cream.

Before that, cheeseburgers with fried onions.

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Whee, snow!

Didn't manage to work from home as hoped, network emergency required attention at Greenfield office. Met wife for hearty lunch at favorite place after, had hot rum drinks, well, I did, anyway.

Went & got some snacks from store, am now going to settle in & let it happen. Hurray!

Working from home to avoid driving about in snowstorm, hurray!

Should probably pick up a few things from the grocery.

Rather than lunch, went for a walk through the old neighborhood, got a coffee & a bear claw, very bright out.

Still feeling a bit off, stiff, rough, cough.

Feeling a bit less fucked up.

Remembered to get kibble & filters, got stuff to make garlic spaghetti, sausages with peppers & onions, came home & made that, helped scrape the ice off the sidewalk, trim the xmas tree, etc., etc.

Some chums came by to visit. Good times.

Keep saying to myself, "Must remember to buy dog food & coffee filters."

Also doing work, hurray!

Good bit of snow this morning, lots more on tap for Friday apparently.

Spent day at work feeling ever more sketchy. Also was told that I'm now working all day in Northampton, bleh.

Got home, walked dogs, then we went for nice dinner at H & O with Karen, began to feel overwhelmingly hungry on arrival there. After eating, started feeling sketchy again. Lying down.

Just made myself dizzy standing up, whee!

Not quite back in Eastern Time, I guess.

Having some difficulty waking up, surprise, surprise.

Dogs are behaving a little strangely. Peretz didn't want breakfast, Pickles didn't want to be outside, etc.

Feel like I spent yesterday folded up in a box.

Overtired & sore, worried that I'll have trouble falling asleep.

Finishing art projects always leaves me at a bit of a loss, nothing's ever really finished of course.

All sorts of odd activity at the back of my mind, lots of stuff back there.

Went & bought xmas tree for what I'm pretty sure was the first time ever, then went & had celebratory return early dinner at Wagon Wheel.

L. seems pretty revved up to do things with tree, I'm having a little lie down, hands are sticky with tar despite aggressive cleansing.

Hippity hop, jiggity jig, as you like.

Remarkable that the planes American uses for long flights apparently have less leg room than the ones for short hops. Knees hurt.

In bed with dogs, should shower, still a bit sandy.

Sunnier this morning, going for a swim.

We both sort of collapsed for a while, let the rain happen, etc. Eventually food was needed, we wanted to go for late night sushi/karaoke at this place in the Marriott after 10, wanted to get a snack before. Wandered aimlessly for a while looking for snack, L. looking a little the worse for wear. Didn't find anything interesting, L. suggested we just go to sushi place now, did that, though it was challenging to find, the Marriott doesn't believe in having too many informational maps in their giant complex, apparently.

Finally did find the place & it was damn good. We all felt better & took a cab home. L.'s passed out next to me, looks to be an early night, probably best, get us closer to being back on Eastern Time & all that. Curses!

Went on a little walk across town to check out antique aloha shirts. I took a wrong turn & we got caught in a torrential downpour, really pretty extreme.

As it died down, we reached the aloha shirt place, L. found a pretty cool Hawaiian print dress for $10 to replace her wet things. No cheap dresses in my size.

Went for shave ice next door after. The wife had mango, I, root beer with condensed milk on top.

Happily, we almost made it home without getting soaked again.

Before all that had an extended swim off the beach out back. Pretty glorious.

Been watching preparations for the Honolulu marathon. The finish line is right up the street.

The last time I arrived at this hotel, it was the Sunday of the marathon, odd.

Got coffees from the musubi shop downstairs. Young lady with plush reindeer antlers was working.

Back at the New Otani after a long time away, seems exactly the same. Had fancy multicourse dinner at Japanese restaurant on the 2nd floor, seemed exactly the same. Our room is directly above the little shop that sells musubi.

Flight over was pretty intense. Arrived in pouring lane, waited a long time in line to check bags, big group of Samoans tying up one of the bag checkers. Got moved to an earlier flight as all planes were late. Arrived at gate to surprise additional TSA inspection, surprised they didn't have puppets. Woman at gate counter moved us to a still earlier flight, which we promptly boarded & away we went.

Our luggage, not so much. While L. awaited its arrival on the slightly later flight, I went to get the rental car through more pouring rain, got back to the baggage claim pretty much just as our bags arrived, as we hit the highway, it stopped raining.

Smooth sailing since then, Japanese dinner as I said, walk into Waikiki, cab back, etc., etc.

Have to pay extra for Internet here, but at least it works.

Forgot to mention that I woke this morning to find that my camera's focal mechanism had failed, bought another at Radio Shack so I could get some great shots of Waimea Canyon, ha.

Kauai leg of trip proving to be a bit of a washout, turns out rain night before last was the most they've had in a night in over 4 years, beaches were mostly closed due to either bacteria or stormy conditions, spent most of day driving back & forth looking for some place to take a dip. Finally managed that in Hanalei Bay, left me feeling pretty tired & grouchy, fell asleep early.

Today, we managed a quick dip close to home early, looked at pretty fishes, then had a delightfully hearty breakfast at the Kountry Kitchen. Tried to go look at Waimea Canyon, but it was totally fogged in & pouring. At the bottom of that in Waimea town now, using pay for Internet at slightly questionable Gallery/Cafe, sipping an Americano because they don't have regular coffee.

Apparently poured pretty seriously on Oahu as well, hope the nice folks at Papa Ole's weathered the storm OK.

Arrived on Kauai to beautiful cottage, sketchy Internet service. Stopped by farmer's market for papayas & rambutan then took a drive out west under setting sun, saw remarkable rainbow rising from red cliff face, luckily avoided crashing car while distracted by it.

Watched the cloud-occluded sunset on a beach with kids ATVing back & forth.

Drove back to Kapaa through wet darkness, went out for fancy drinks & dinner, not as good as what we have back home, but tasty enough & L. got her caesar salad, as did I.

Stormed during the night, slept like log through most of that, woke around 9 to flooded yard, wet sneakers.

Going to go to some beach or other shortly. Love to all.

We ended up collapsing in heaps late afternoon yesterday, missed the Mormon/Polynesian spectacular, can't say I'm too disappointed, even without giving them money, the thought of being in close proximity to that loopy hate cult makes my skin crawl.

Got some late night saimin & came home & crashed again.

I got up early & watched the low key sunrise, then took a walk down the street to the market for cigarettes, snapping photos along the way. Just got back & told L. it was about time for her to get up, we've got a car to return & a flight to catch.

This first leave taking is making me feel like the honeymoon's already over. I want more life.

Turning out to be a close to home kind of day, L. managed to actually sleep until a reasonable hour, spent much of the morning lazing about. Went to my new favorite plate lunch place for an early lunch/late breakfast, L. got another breakfast sandwich, without cheese this time, I got more garlic chicken, but the extremely friendly cashier hooked me up with a complimentary side of beef teriyaki. Also offered us free tickets to nightly Polynesian spectacular at the Mormon run cultural center down the road, a sister works there apparently. We were told to return after one for the tickets. Also gave us some buns drenched in coconut sauce which I quite liked, L. not so much.

Went up to Laie point, pretty spectacular, on the way there, noticed the Leonard Jr.'s truck in shopping center. Stopped there on the way back from point for more hot malasadas. Going to hell for sure.

Burned a few of the excess calories frolicking at nearby beach, mostly just floated around.

Stopped back by plate lunch place for tickets around two. Tickets had not yet arrived, waited around checking out the scene, lots of dogs, flamboyant gays & hardy worker types, a lively scene. Just as we were giving up, sister arrived with tickets.

Went back to Laie looking for a soap case & q-tips, while the wife was fetching those, went & got refreshing frozen drinks.

Back at the place, sitting on the lanai, sipping frozen drinks.

Having a very pleasant vacation, loco moco at quality place down the street, snorkling at Hanauma Bay, Leonard's malasadas, both cinnamon sugar & strawberry custard filled (preferred the non-filled), more swimming at delightfully wavy beach being used mostly by boogie boarders, nice Japanese dinner, etc., etc.

Having a guava nectar with vodka, should really shower off some of this salt & grit.

Hope you're feeling better, Mom, tried to call, didn't work.

Woke ridiculously early again today, but not quite as ridiculously early. Watched another beautiful sunrise.

Ended up eating twice yesterday at Papa Ole's, the plate lunch place down the street I was interested in via various Internet review sites, pretty fantastic, garlic chicken was mind blowing. Wish I knew how juicy sauciness within crispy exterior was achieved. Super friendly dinner server promised to hook us up if we returned today for breakfast, hurray!

Raining a little, out on the lanai under an overhang as the wireless works better.

Enjoying typical vacation Internet access, blech.

Otherwise things are lovely, soaked in hot tub, ate garlicky shrimp, got a hat, had shave ice with ice cream, splashed in waves, macadamia pancakes, etc., etc.

L. keeps sending me cows on Facebook. She's pretty awesome.

Woke a little while ago, listened to call of distant tropical chicken for a bit, then walked down to water, constant rolling surf, strong steady breeze, sat there for a little while, came back to room & had a little water.

Finally got to Honolulu, learned that Hawaii has recently enacted bizarre overreaching antismoking ordinance, dealt with surly car rental people, rush hour traffic, etc.

Very tired, finally got to rental, weird hassle with key, L.'s mad there are no screen doors, otherwise seems pretty OK to me.

Took a walk up the busy, busy street for liquor & Korean BBQ.

The party's started, hurrah!

Sitting in weirdly lit terminal, thinking about research into treating PTSD by interfering with the formation of long term memories. I expect if that's ever successful we'll end up being loaded naked into cargo planes & given a little shot at the other end. Might be preferable.

Me & the wife just back from the security theater, waiting at our gate.

Morning wasn't as much of a mad rush as I expected, thanks, Ian.

Woken a little while ago by call from work, not anything I could really help with, thankfully.

Need to get up an hour & a half from now to go to airport, how odd.

Just back from dropping the dogs at Meadowrock Kennel in Suffield, made us both feel a little melancholy, dogs seemed fine.

Stopped for some White Hut on the way home, yum yum.

L.'s work xmas party in a bit. Will try to sleep after that, I guess.

Wikipedia says: "Attention please: The Titan Cronus/Kronos (Κρόνος in Greek) is sometimes mythologically confused with Chronos (Χρόνος in Greek), the personification of time." But you already knew that.

Too many pictures in my head.

Im Dom, da steht ein Bildniss
Auf goldenem Leder gemalt.
In meines Lebens Wildniss
Hat's freundlich hineingestrahlt.

Getting ready for last little bit of work before vacation. Sitting on back porch with dogs, started writing a poem in my head, then lost track of it. Pickles barked at squirrels as I watched them run along the roofline of the neighboring barn.

After work, need to take the dogs to kennel, hopefully it'll be fun for them, wish they could see Hawaii. Afraid of flying.

In my mind's eye, watching a kappa turn into a chi and back again.

Went for final meal at H & O, before trip anyway, cosmos, clam chowder, brisket plates with waffles. Pretty fucking idyllic.

Been reading about plate lunch & shave ice places on yelp & the like.

Plate lunch, shave ice. We're going to go swimming, hurrah!

Just back from walking the dogs, one by one, through the grim, wet darkness of early evening.

Waiting to hear about dinner plans.

Finally did laundry for trip.

Idiotic morning at work, working from home this afternoon, have a very stiff neck, just took a very hot shower, maybe it'll help.

Yogurt & rice seem to be working their magic.

Stiff & sore, warmer this morning.

Lazily lying about, reading about ambiguity. Just read some joker claiming people don't generally employ it on purpose. Lot he knows.

Fed Peretz some rice & yogurt, L. made tacos, everybody's happy.

Peretz seems a good deal better this morning, kept me up late, shivering wrapped in a towel, poor little guy.

Should make him some rice & yogurt later.

Hopefully they'll stay out of the oil today.

Sitting up with sick pup, watching Dr. Who.

Make a wish.

Poor sick pup.

Came home to a vomiting Peretz. After extensive bile cleanup, found the culprit, a bottle of Wesson canola oil, 3/4 full as of yesterday evening, now topless & empty. Pickles seems fine.

We just took them both for a walk, bit more gagging from Peretz. We're cuddled up in a blanket now, he's shivering.

Make a wish, doesn't work, couldn't hurt, etc., etc.

Want some tasty lunch.

It's funny to feel simultaneously exploited & insufficiently taken advantage of, welcome to the American workplace, I suppose.

Wishing I had some ibuprofen.

Sometimes I enjoy the feeling that I am concealing whole universes.

This is, of course, a lot of nonsense-just drips & drabs, mostly not so much hidden as not worth mentioning.

Still, alone with idiosyncratically connoting signs, building little networks, a nice enough hobby horse.

One of these days, I'll finally reread Tristram Shandy.

Back from another soup & game night, black bean soup makes it all better, got the wife so revved up she's back at work working on work, the little piston.

Strangely warm for the day after snow & ice.

Pickles is lazily chewing on something.

Chair at work is making my back hurt.

Bored, stressed, tired, anxious, want to get out of here & off to Hawaii already.

This year is shaping up as the stupidest at this job yet.

Ice to rain, blech. Icy pools in back yard are kind of neat, I guess.

Sleepy, chilly.

Snow's changed to ice, L.'s made cookies, listening to sleet's rustle, watching Dr. Who.

Would like to fall asleep & wake to lots more weekend.

Snow, snow, snow!

Just went back & forth to work in the snow, snow, snow, not particularly slick, people driving like idiots, salt trucks out.

Supposed to warm up later, will try to enjoy while it lasts.

Feel so much dumber than when I was a kid, frustrating.

From across the street, "Bye!" "Bye, I love you!" Closing car doors.

Peretz & Pickles had a mildly violent dispute over food.

Should go do work.

L. got coffee, lovely woman.

All sorts of fun doings out & about, foot hurts too much.

Need coffee, foot hurts too much.

Took a hot bath & some ibuprofen, helped a bit.

Finally went to check out Countrypie in Ashfield, crust only passable but very nice in all other respects, though my colleagues objected to the cleanliness of the tables & the parmesan baked on the pies (not the quality of the cheese but its simple presence. Learned of another new pizza option in Colrain while there, will have to check that out at some point.

Foot's back to hurting, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Smoked sausages are en route to us by post.

Was settling in for a quiet evening when a sudden splash alerted me that something was amiss. Appalled wife relayed the information that Peretz was vomiting from her once cozy perch by the fire. Quite voluminous, bit of a bear to clean up, found the chunky, fuzzy bits by the dog bed particularly upsetting.

Anyway, all better now, I hope.

Finally have clean clothes, washed myself in celebration.

L. made a rum cake.

Came home from work, picked turkey carcass fairly clean, had turkey sandwiches. Meant to write that down hours ago, too spacey.

Brought in more wood, watching Everest documentary.

Odd cold symptoms, after leaving me largely alone while making & enjoying holiday supper, returned while I slept, kept waking up coughing. A little more work, then nap, I think.

It's sleeting.

Made a pretty lavish Thanksgiving spread, fairly substantial company ended up trickling in, some brought scotch, happy days.

We're all watching Star Trek futuristically streamed to our TV over modern computer networks.

Want some pie, still too full.

Macy's Parade, Macy's Parade.

Saw Snoopy, where's Underdog?

Left work early, came home & took a nap. Got up around 4 & started cleaning the kitchen, preparing sweet potatoes for pie & squash for roasting, L. got home, made enchiladas & cookies, then I made pie.

Cooking made me feel somewhat better, generally does.

Went to see some music in Turner's, talked to a bunch of people, got tired & came home.

Lying down, realized how shitty I feel. Fucking cold.

Coming down with something, coughing my head off at desk. Was feeling a little unusually woozy & sleepy last night, guess that's why.

Want some soup.

Strange, disrupted sleep.

Was going to make sweet potato pies last night, was too sleepy & lazy.

Dreamt of things without number, mostly mechanical. Kept waking to warm dogs.

Feel like I'm at the bottom of a well.

Could use a soda, maybe I'll get a soda.

Usually comforting machine hum oppressive today.

Rainy, rainy morning = trouble getting up.

Finally struggled upstairs to the wife with coffee, watched "Rainy Days & Mondays", other Carpenters videos for a bit, skipped the shower, walked dogs in the rain.

Last night, while trying to sleep, found mind veering off in unpleasant directions, needed to put on anime to quieten it. After that, had the usual wacky cartoon dreams.

First it's really cold for a few days, then it rains. That's the way it plays in Tennessee.

So, Massachusetts has gone south.

Work is so dismal lately, nothing much going on there other than stupidity & layoffs. The stupid people are almost never the ones to leave.

We have very little food in the house apart from stuff for Thanksgiving. Despite that, made what I think was a pretty passable vegetable curry.

After that, sat around watching TV & drinking whisky & ginger ales.

Job is giving me a stomach ache. More of that to come, I'd guess. Got to love being the guy who deletes people's user accounts in a recession. Ick.

Banana pudding went over pretty well, pretty much like I remembered it, though it would've been nice to let it sit longer.

Warmer today, but a damp chill in the air.

Slept late, went to brunch with the wife & kid, delightful brunch got comped as a result of L.'s social networking activities on their behalf. Nice.

Took kid down to Smith to meet his ride home, then went Thanksgiving shopping, also got stuff to make desserts for multiperson birthday party later. I made an enormous banana pudding, like old times. L.'s making double chocolate cookies.

Not quite as cold today.

Sal's out for a visit for the first time in ages, we just watched The Evil Dead, try to be a good influence.

Shocking cold continues, should probably take the dogs for a walk.

Fell asleep by the fire, kept waking in awkward positions with a dog wedged between me & the couch.

This morning, tried to get warm donuts from Adams, but they had already stopped making them, got some nonwarm donuts, still delightful.

First morning it's been so cold my car's steering was stiff.

Just back from lunch with Henry, Nancy & Alice en route to Portland, ME. Kid's getting pretty hefty, cool to see her packing away meatloaf clubs & the like though the rest of us could also have used some lunch.

One extremely taxing workweek down, one to go. Lying in a pile with dogs.

Thinking about how communicating on the Internet tends to make people seem like cartoon characters. Or maybe it pulls back the veil, revealing them to be such.

More inclined to believe the latter, that the naturalism of everyday life is more a product of awkward physicality than anything in anyone's mind.

Thinking about how terrible most people are at improvised performance, how everything is improvised performance.

Should probably avoid getting up early.

Woke early, around six, tried to check email, Internet connection was down, fixed it.

Went out back with dogs, very cold, thought about Hawaii, now my fingers hurt.

Returned home from another excessively busy day, made gorgonzola tortellini with cognac cream sauce & roasted butternut squash with maple & butter that I'd been meaning to make all week.

Walked dogs through the crisp air spewing gibberish countrified similes all the while.

Going to watch Dirty Harry.

Kraut dogs & butterscotch pudding for lunch, sometimes it seems the world was designed for my pleasure.

Thinking about people not knowing their own minds.

Been talking about amusingly broken ad server.

Morning dog fracas a bit more extreme than is usual.

Some day this week is going to end.

Just back from deluxe three course dinner largely courtesy of absurd Little Red Riding Hood outfit. Pistachio crusted salmon with mango hollandaise & the like, hurray!

Work continues busy, time flies when you're having fun.

L. went to glower at the D.A. for being a racist pig for a bit, good work, sweepea.

Sleepy day, would rather be sleeping.

Last night, really lovely dinner at the H & O, then straight to bed.

Enjoying the briskness.

Frosty morn, front steps were slippery.

Inability to get head around work coming to the fore sooner than usual before a vacation, oh well. Probably going to be busy with user support that requires no thought most of the time anyway.

Hands hurt.

Headache comes & goes, back again, pretty unbearable.

Cold, cold night. Low, yellow half moon.

Today as I went to & fro, little bursts of snow. Nice.

Stopped for some slices on the way home.

About half an hour after arriving at work, headache was back in full force. Coffee's pushed it back a little.

Booked car rentals for Oahu legs of Hawaii trip, all done booking stuff for that, I think.

Want to be in Hawaii already.

Going to be a stressful couple of weeks of work with most of the rest of the IT staff in press training, stupid, stupid, stupid.

Woke in the middle of the night to imaginary phone calls about Aztec curse & stomach cramps. Dumb old mummy didn't need that mask.

Overslept a bit, just checked work email, need to walk the dog & go.

Strangely, strenuous yard labor seems to have made my back feel better.

Kind of a fun party, amusing chatter, Making Time & the like playing quietly through TV speakers.

Before & after, blinding headache, barely made it in from the car.

Got back from work, lazed about for a bit, walked dogs, then went to brunch with chums. After that, leaf raking. Stupidly omitted gloves, now have mildly abraded hands.

More resting now, dinner party later.

Rebooting servers.

Seems like we're back to cold & sunny.

Back hurts.

Went to store in pouring rain for makings of quiches & cake.

Sitting around with wet dogs waiting for quiches to bake.

Rain has died down somewhat.

Slept for a long while, pretty great.

Still raining.

Still raining.

Went to see the new Bond flick, pretty entertaining, annoying audience.

After that, L. headed south for a benefit, I had some leftover chili & settled in with pups.

Continuing to settle in.

Today continues wet, bleh.

Thought Henry & Co. were coming today, turns out it's next week, bleh.

L. wants to go see Iron & Wine tomorrow, but it's sold out.

You get the idea.

Made sandwiches, fell asleep by fire. Woke up & the house was gone.

Actually, just woke up, shut down fire, came upstairs with pups. Still raining, feeling benevolent, won't let it throw me.

Spacing out, watching Dr. Who.

Rainy & cold. May make a fire.

Got stuff for sandwiches.

Dark & dreary day brightened by some spicy noodles & a Snickers bar.

Have a bit of a chill.

They've hung curtains outside the windows by my desk to separate me a bit from the photo studio, bit like the bottom of a grave.

Fell asleep away from my alarm clock, woke much the same time as always.

Spent a little time reading some stuff by people I consider pretty good writers, always amazed when someone's writing seems to flow naturally. I imagine there's some art or another to it, but I can't help but feel they also lack my sense of writing everything on a distant wall with a long awkward stick. Probably also trust themselves somewhat.

As always, the prize for my morning exertions, a cup of coffee, pretty good prize.

Near total indifference can provide a pretty good simulation of being open and trusting, working on it.

Got to thinking about long ago time when my flickr account didn't have 36000 or so photos on it, went back & labeled some.

It's really a pretty excessive number of photos. Hm.

Got home feeling extremely addled, work, traffic, etc. Went to H & O for salad, ending up getting excessive quantities of all sorts of stuff & a very stiff drink. No longer feel addled, am now a bit overly sedate.

Getting cold fast now once the sun is down. Lovely haze haloed moon tonight.

First morning of the season my car's windows were notably frosted.

Getting a little better at getting up & going.

90 years since WW I, what a fucking mess.

Muscles hurt, hungry, cold.

Intensified cheapness, battiness, etc. at work making me feel a bit on edge.

Simultaneously nerve wracking and very, very dreadfully & deeply dull is what I'm saying.

Want to be on holiday already.

Armistice Day, Armistice Day.

Finding it harder to get up every day, not because I'm sleepy, getting too much enjoyment from lazy reverie. Imagined characters, conversations.

Thinking about my Sunday burger & malted project, should get back on that.

Thinking about the strange ubiquity of electronic devices, networked & otherwise, how most of my time is spent interacting with them. Stranger that this is also true of people who don't have that as a job.

OK, back to it.

"Refusing all Definite Form, the Abstract Horror roofd. stony hard."

That's what I'm talking about.

Had a candy bar, Three Musketeers.

Sitting at desk, feeling stiff.

Little old lady in newsroom keeps screwing up her mail client, removing toolbar repeatedly, opening new messages while in the midst of typing and typing on obliviously, then claiming her work has disappeared, etc.

Should probably be job hunting.

Getting a little lost in dizzying exhaustion. There was a time I'd communicate that more concretely, may be best I don't.

Abstraction is, like most things, even better than expected.

Back from Syracuse, took the scenic route back, lovely golden light on the last leg & now.

Going to load in some wood, then go retrieve the pups from their bondage.

In Syracuse, pretty rainy on the drive over.

Before that, dropped the dogs at the spa, got hot glazed donuts.

L.'s showing her mom how to use her new computer. Later, I will remove spyware.

After warming up a frozen pot pie for dinner, lay down for a little rest, woke up about an hour ago.

Sounds of geese from beyond the railroad tracks.

Need to prepare for travel.

Having fun trying to explain to people about MIME types, email headers, etc. Fun times.

Weekend rushing toward us, hip, hip.

Would rather be in bed with Peretz snuggled to my hip.

So, last night's karaoke was a bit of a drag, a lot of bad singers doing slow contemporary ballads, aroma of past prime fish fry, overcharged for drinks, etc. L. did a fine rendition of 'I Can Help' though.

Spending a lot of time lately feeling tired in unfamiliar ways, maybe this is how normal people feel? Adrenal fatigue?

Strange balminess continues.

Thinking about my coming return to Syracuse, what a funny year & some odd days.

L.'s not yet back from her board meeting, may go out for karaoke later.

Warm, gray day. Back at work.

Feeling strangely tranquil, makes it a little hard to concentrate.

More coffee, maybe.

Spent most of the day pursuing much needed downtime, pretty great.

Still oddly warm, writing this on the back porch, dogs, having just eaten, are exploring the yard.

In a little while, going out for nice dinner.

Now & then, my life seems strangely idyllic, with very little of the worries that try most people.

Have, of course, an elaborate, eccentric set of worries of my own, but they're mine, and I am, in many ways, fond of them.

Just walked the dogs, still strangely balmy, should break out the ukelele later.

Watching anime centering around giant airships streaming over the Internet to my TV.

New age & all that, should go pour myself a tall glass of local soda, maybe.

Unsurprising, but oh, ick.

Stuck in my head:



Late night of dedicated availability = taking the day off, yip, yip.

Quiet night sitting by the phone, waiting for stuff to break.

Just took a break from that to buy some cigarettes from the Cumbie's down the street, young lady working there seemed really happy.

Went & voted, felt dirty after, went & flushed my system with high quality local donuts.

Making lunch plans.

Fell asleep very early, had extremely vivid dreams mostly involving imaginary friends of friends & conversations about memorials, terror, books & the the hoi polloi. Long rides in cars down tree-lined avenues, sympathetic looks. I was crying a lot, but not particularly unhappy.

Going to skip out of work to go vote sometime mid-morning.

Would like to spend a few days curled up in a ball somewhere, with no one bothering me. Will probably pass.

Flat, dull day leaving me sleepy, edgy, etc., etc.

Monday's being a drag.

Also cold & gray.

Last night, falling asleep, found myself reflecting on myself and seeing nothing.

Spent a lot of the day very sleepy, early evening felt like the middle of the night, now strangely alert.

Welcome Standard Time, I guess.

Another lovely brunch, a bit busier & more sociable than usual, both sweet & savory waffles on offer.

Steve's leaving for NYC shortly, then we're going to head out for the usual Sunday work & shopping.

Chilly breezes today, sunlight impressive on the mostly yellow remaining leaves.

Had a dream that Peretz's left front leg was horribly mutilated, skin pulled or rubbed off the lower front, knee cap exposed. Woke half convinced it was true.

Yellow leaves are falling dramatically in our back yard.

Just watched TV adaptation of "Dreams in the Witchhouse".

Before that, music fest in Turners, my friend Steve came from Pennsylvania to play at that, he's asleep in the next room.

Maybe we'll get brunch tomorrow.

Went to a couple Halloween parties, didn't stay long at one, insufficiently Halloweeny, at the other,much to my surprise, came in 2nd in the costume contest. Was a reasonably fun party, kind of wish they'd had savory snacks.

Before that, got cleaned out of our stock of candy by a bunch of snotty nosed kids, pretty adorable.

Treats?

Slept really late, pretty fabulous.

After that, was out in back with dogs, smoking & thinking about what, if anything, I was going to do about a Halloween costume, emerged from reverie to observe that Peretz, having somehow come disconnected from his line, was wandering off into the neighbors' yard. Tried to call him back, which of course didn't work. He instead wandered into the neighbors' garage where I went, in my pajamas, to recover him.

We're getting old & slow, we are.

Went & helped some nice old folks, then to grocery for root vegetables & squash. Made a red curry with those.

L. came home around 8, quickly ate some of the curry & went off on her merry way. Music, music.

Dogs are fed & walked, done for day.

Just learned that one of my new colleagues was among the group of morris dancers I watched dancing by the Potholes Columbus Day weekend two years ago after the Ashfield Fall Festival. Strange, morris dancing.

Cool air, hum of machines. Just ordered a usb hub.

Slept a little late, then hit the ground running, issuing sage technical advice, etc., etc.

Still a bit bleary eyed, getting too old for the late night rock 'n' roll bit.

Working for the weekend.

Just back from another Brain Exchange, they've gotten too darn crowded. Enjoyed the music/performance stuff, punk celebrity interview ran a bit long, was too quiet to hear much of anyway, had a nice chat with Cooper about how shows aren't as fun as they should be.

Should go to sleep, feeling a bit wound up.

They've moved the photo studio to right next to my office, flash keeps going off in my eyes. Very annoying. At first, thought there was a serious electrical problem or my brain was going haywire.

Otherwise, things are back to dull, dull, dull.

Managed to get up earlier than normal, feeling less tired generally, crisp air helps.

Sadly, but as expected, missed out on snow, want snow.

Thinking about taking Friday off.

Late in the day at work, things started to break, stayed late fixing them. Drove home through the rainy night, stopping for a few groceries on the way. Made some roasted mashed sweet potatoes & beef croquets in a mushroom cream sauce.

I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan, etc.

Actually did bring some bacon home the other day, haven't fried it up yet.

Last night, went home, walked the dogs, made semi-elaborate baked pasta dish, did nothing much else.

This morning, overslept, rushed walk with Peretz in the gentle rain, off to work.

Here I am at work.

Forgot to mention Peretz has been engaging in some civil disobedience lately.



Brave little pup!

Boss out sick = chaotic morning, beats the usual dull.

Feeling strangely well rested.

Finally fell asleep, woke to chimichangas, pretty fantastic, but it's true.

Still very sleepy.

Seem to have lost my newfound knack for napping.

Fiddlesticks.

Went & did that pumpkin carving.



Lovely day for it.

L's downstairs working on guacamole for the chimichangas, I'm going to take a nap.

Got up earlier than I'd like, went & rebooted servers, on the way home picked up pie & pumpkins, going to walk dogs then go to pumpkin carving party.

Last night's storm was quite something, went out in it to catch some of Who cover fest, poor visibility, people driving badly, trash cans at gas station blown over, turn signal wrenched sideways, Pearl Street a raging torrent full of tiny almond-shaped leaves.

Sunny & pleasant now.

About to head out into the rainy night. More music, more music, more music.

Spent the last little while sharing blanket with the pups, very pleasant.

Pretty serious weekend laziness, we did finally get down to some vacation planning brass tacks, beginning to really look forward to the trip.

Out on the porch with Peretz, overcast, rain later.

Reading about Hawaiian food destinations has left me with strange, unattainable cravings. Salty, salty.

Oh so very sleepy.

Had a fun night.

L. came home early & we took the dogs for a nice walk down by the river.

One load of laundry down, one to go.

About to go out for dinner, cocktails with pals & Deerhoof.

In process of reforming soul after week of soul sucking tedium. First step was enjoying newly returned meatloaf club, the second some lazing about, the third, shower. What's next? Reuben chimichanga?

Doing laundry.

Frosty morning, just out in back with pups, thinking about left wing screed I read yesterday chastising people for unrealistically hoping for technological solutions to their problems. Seems to me those have mostly worked out better than political ones, not that I'm particularly hopeful or anything.

Simple life's a hard sell, best of luck.

Dogs were just going berserk, have now settled down again.

In bed, doing some work, waiting for some computers to reboot.

Chile relleno night tonight, really delicious, kind of hoping chimichanga night's next.

Just back from time in hot office with overheating(?) iMac, bit sweaty.

Off schedule Microsoft patch interfering with my weekend R&R plans.

Got a Halloween balloon for my office, on one side are worried eyes, the other says 'eek!'

Woke to a down Internet connection, spent some time fixing it, some more time attempting to humorously dramatize the problem for the wife.

Working all day in Northampton today, sorry Peretz, Pickles.

Tacos, tacos.

Went from feeling pretty lousy to pretty great in about the time it takes to eat a taco.

Collapsed in a contented heap.

Taco night, yip, yip.

Very much looking forward to getting my head around some tacos, feeling pretty drained.

Also learned that Deerhoof is playing in Northampton on Friday & I can go without contributing to hated entertainment group, pleasure universe.

Dragging myself through the morning, music last night left me a bit wound up, had trouble falling asleep. Finally woken by urgent barks from Peretz, still not sure what that was about.

Gusty & gray.

Went & saw some music at the Pint, some really beautiful stuff, a bit hard to focus on amidst the chattering yahoos. It happens.

Before that, Buffy, Italian subs, kind of idyllic.

Before that, what?

Reading about exaggerated startle responses, providing ever more ridiculous user support.

Mostly, I'd rather be asleep.

Looking forward to lunch of tasty leftovers.

Noticed just now, while showering, that my hands still smelled of garlic from yesterday's curry prep, threw my thoughts down long strange avenues, domesticity, wildness.

Thoughts are beginning to rove a bit further afield generally, cooler weather always helps.

Just took a picture of a leaf on our marble bistro table.

There was a time, not long ago, when I was much more fluid, linguistically & otherwise, feeling old & stiff.

Back still hurts, at least spasms have stopped for now. Advil, coffee, etc.

Woke around 6:30 with a strange feeling of unease, then slept a little more.

Sometimes, sleepy & with my guard down, I find myself thinking about politics, it's awful.

Finally got around to making that curry, pretty tasty, made rice with saffron also.

Feeling not quite all here, hollow, achy.

Will maybe watch more TV.

Was planning to spend day flat on back, emergency of work came up, so just went back & forth to Amherst, flipping switches & such.

Don't feel very good.

Got news that cat is doing well in new home, happy days.

Dreamt last night of climbing around a junkyard, came across a painting of Underdog on a ledge, took out my camera to take a picture & it got up & ran away, green cape glistening in the wind.

Back muscles on the fritz again, having trouble standing up.

Back's acting up again, watching the ball game.

Went & did some dreaded work, wasn't so bad. Driving home, saw a bald eagle circling over 91.

Stopped at the grocery for dog food & other necessities, makings of queso, etc.

Brunch momentarily, hurrah.

So, outing accomplished- went to the Target in Keene & stocked up on Halloween goodies, then went to Burdick's for hot chocolate, chocolate penguins, Halloween chocolate assortment. A pound of kusa to go & a sushi dinner later, we're home again.

Dogs are eating their dinners, just walked them, brisk out.

May go to a movie in town in a bit.

Went & got the makings of a curry to go with the garlic naan L. bought the other day, may make that later, may make that tomorrow.

It's a dramatically beautiful fall day, would like to go on an outing, maybe.

Woke to bacon & french toast, what I'm talking about.

Had fun singing, ended singing with two acts as it turned out, enjoy singing.

Before that, enjoyed the mac 'n' cheese special at the Shady Glen.

Head hurts a little.

Apparently I may sing at a show tonight, fun, fun.

Just fixed a printer remotely.

Hungry.

Actually feel rested for once, aces.

Just a few more hours of complete boredom before happy free time.

Everybody's working for the weekend.

Came home, made fried rice with bacon, broccoli & onions, pretty tasty.

After that we walked the dogs.

Came home again, collapsed.

L.'s headed off to get more googly eyed Halloween stickers & see a show.

Me, I'm resting.

Wonder if the bosses would be willing to spring for some Boredom Management training.

Disappearing into the hum of equipment.

Thinking about this October, the last & the one before that, funny how different they all are. Bored stiff, busy bee, crisis mode, all on a lovely orange backdrop.

& just like that, Harriet's gone. Another one for me to miss, hope she's happier.

Apart from continuing back pain, feel pretty pleasant physically, warm glow of sufficient sleep.

It's Waffle Day.

Apparently we're giving away our cat. L's been becoming increasingly concerned about the dogs ganging up on her, egging each other on, etc. Doesn't worry me quite as much, but I can see where she's coming from. Sad to see Harriet go, she's a very nice cat, good company.

Sigh.

Having some coffee, not perking me up much.

Having fun at work with shooting back pain, spicy Chex Mix.

Half wishing my mind were a little less vivid.

Oh, well.

Driving to dinner, saw low pink moon dominating the horizon. All day sucker.

Cool weather again, time for scotch & holding hands.

Thinking about Gore Vidal.

Here's to ya.

Home again, flat on my still aching back, just back from the Four Leaf Clover, nice place, quality pie.

Approving installation of security updates for my corporate masters.

Last night's backache turned into this morning's back spasm. Has moderated now, pressing on.

Beautiful gray autumn day, misty rain.

Extreme boredom at work.

Spent the afternoon away from work, doing nonwork things, now back at work for a bit, catching up on work. Back hurts, over full.

Just put some transparent nail polish on thumbnail that keeps cracking, watching it dry.

Slept very poorly last night, strangely agitated again, blech.

Chaotic morning at work, better than the usual dull.

Just back from really lovely show in barn in Montague, Tuneyards was particularly good.

Also did some work & shopping, got warm slippers, spices.

Off to a birthday party shortly.

Went & saw Nashville, always a strange experience, familiar locations I can't quite place. After that, went to noise show at the Pint, good times, nice to have a short drive home after.

Pickles is gurgling under my comforter.

Made a frittata, watching more Dr. Who.

While frittata was cooking, spent some time on the back porch, thinking about others' enigmatic behavior as well as my own.

Feel better having eaten.

Slow morning, L.'s in bed with a headache, I just walked the dogs.

Thinking about lunch.

Have become quite the napper of late, time was I was never caught napping.

Would like to nap more.

Foliage is looking to be a hot ticket this year.

The mail server where I am presently working is shockingly crappy, dealing with that now.

Want a snack, want to be home hanging out with the pups, want, want, want.

Want the fucking election to be over so people will stop talking to me about it.

Feeling itchy all over, inside my head, etc. What comes of sassing an angry & vengeful god, perhaps.

Just spent a little time pouring over logs, would rather be sawing some.

Bleh.

Car wasn't done when I went to get it at noon, had a pulled pork burrito while I waited. Happy Yom Kippur.

Went home to let the dogs out, received notification from my bank about fee increases, new fees, should really get a new bank.

As far as I can tell, car is actually fixed, hurrah. Newly warm air seems to contain something I'm allergic to, boo, hiss.

Feeling exhausted, wondering yet again why that can't simply be taken for what it is.

Also itchy.

Dropped my car to have its transmission control unit replaced, will hopefully be done by lunchtime.

Welcomed the Day of Atonement with a dinner of braised pork belly & legumes at new French bistro on West St. Now feeling a bit over full as is fit & proper.

Before that, while awaiting L. & friend's arrival, watched the sunset over the Mill River, fascinating turbulent sparkles downstream of the dam. On the athletic fields beyond the river, young women practiced a team sport I didn't recognize.

Feeling a little lightheaded.

Had an extremely vivid dream involving fixing a large number of bizarre problems with the computer at work that makes the advertisements into encapsulated postscript files.

Just got a call from work about nothing important while loud dog antics proceeded in their usual way.

Have a case of the sneezes.

Just watched Spiderman 3.

After that, sat out on the cold porch, smoking, drinking a cold glass of half grapefruit/half lemon, half Vulcan, half human.

Now watching The Facts of Life.

It's extra special tedium day at work, lucky I'm sleepy.

Busily fulfilling contractual obligations to credit card processing firm.

Whistling while I work.

Extreme drowsiness continues.

Having tiny waves of panic apropos nothing.

Going to walk around a little.

Peretz's cat obsession threw a small wrench into morning routine, glad the cat had the sense to come in from the cold, anyway.

Pickles's digestive disturbance seems to be on the mend.

Geese honking overhead.

Could use a nap.

Was really just somebody being stupid.

Been a busy little drone today, want to get out of here & get my free soup, damn it.

Checking ickily complex data flow problem that is probably really just somebody being stupid, need to trace my way through anyhow, oh, bother.

Slow drippy rain outside, would rather be sleeping.

Went to festival, got fried dough with maple cream, Tibetan dumplings, a couple books, saw the sights, etc.

On the way home was feeling tired & sore & cranky.

Made spicy stew, did laundry, walked dogs, etc. Even more tired & sore, no longer cranky.

Going to watch more Doctor Who.

Slow, beautiful morning. Still playing with new toy, sipping coffee.

Very stiff from yesterday's stacking.

Halfway wanting to go to the Festival of the Hills.

Went & did a little work, picked up magic movie streaming box that was delivered to work yesterday, went to town & got a bagel after, then walked up to the Forbes to see some music.

Came home, hooked up magic box, used it to watch Pan's Labyrinth. Pretty groovy.

Stacked a lot of wood, solid citizens.

Pretty sweaty.

Pretty & sweaty, we are.

Woke to coffee & glazed donuts. It's like magic.

Peretz is resting his cold paws on my leg, wants donut.

Went to get a coffee & came across helpful teens in front of the library with voter registration forms, feel confident that this is Nader's year.

Ha ha.

Gloomy & brisk out, almost feels like snow. Might rain, should probably get tarp before wood delivery.

More violent coughing, lovely way to start the day.

Cold feet, really must get some cozy slippers.

Warming my feet on Peretz.

When I home, L. announced that we was heading to Boston later to see a show and was going to take a nap first. Brave lady.

Went & got a burrito & myself together. Decided to make a small batch of mac 'n' cheese to speed her on her way.

As I was doing that she came downstairs & announced she'd decided against going. Smart lady.

Returned that hamper, got fancy sandwich & cake.

Lingering cough, resolving technical issues.

Trip to Hawaii finally coming into focus.

The glorious fall is in full swing.

Stuck inside at a desk with an itchy nose & throat.

Need to remember to return H & O's hamper.

The autumn winds blow chilly & cold.

Didn't get much I wanted done, did watch some TV. As I left work, started feeling shaky & strange, like I'd had far too much coffee. Got home & laid down for a while, vibrating. L. went & got us Italian coldcut subs from down the street. They were really lovely, toasty deliciousness.

Still feeling odd, had an apple & some cheese & crackers, have now returned to the safety of blanket.

Oh, fuck, my mom used to go out with this dude:



Not the first time he's come up, like a bad penny.

Getting email berating me for not writing enough, ok, ok.

Busy day, car's in the shop getting a second transmission issue fixed, first one will get fixed later. One foot in front of the other.

Later, wood stacking, watching TV, would like to buy & cook some vegetables. Probably should do dishes, laundry, not going to.

Earlier, rushed out to throw tarp over new wood getting wet in morning drizzle, under desk fixing UPS, eating blueberry pancakes with a sides of bacon & home fries with hot sauce, etc., etc.

Little cursor, dashing back & forth.

Wow, very nice dinner, watched some crappy TV, ordered myself a new toy, pretty super all around.

Had a very strong frou frou drink with dinner, took the edge off all day headache.

Also finally paid for our party, glad to have gotten to that.

Mind veers off in grim directions, force of habit.

Head hurts so much I'm having a hard time looking at anything.

A little while ago, my nose started bleeding.

Fine, thanks, I'm fine.

Doppelgänger.

Spooky.

Peretz was just visiting with Berkeley doppelgänger in the back yard, esse est percipi.

Little purple morning glories keep on blooming despite it being past their time. Wonder if they know I'm rooting for them.

Came back in to shower, couldn't get Peretz to come in, he was desperately wanting to rush to the aid of other pups crying in the distance. Can hear him crying outside now.

We're a lot alike.

Sad, not sad, sad. All blurs together, then doesn't.

Was thinking earlier about how much more time I've spent alone than most, not as good at it as I was.

Lungs hurt, head hurts.

Want to curl up in a ball & stay that way.

Stuffy head, half watching Lost.

Should go cut up an apple.

Feeling a strange mix of great & lousy.

In the midst of peacefully making dinner (consisting of reheated pork ribs & pilaf-stuffed roasted delicata squash), was looking out our window & saw an SUV driving on the wrong side of street crash into a parked SUV with a muted bang. Much shouting commenced, cops have now arrived, whee.

1st cop on scene just shooed away 2nd cop, another plainclothes cop in nondescript coupe.

Going to get back to making dinner, waiting for the economy to collapse.

Finally got up the energy to walk the pups, have used up my energy.

Also got apples. L'Shana Tova.

Planning Yom Kippur supper involving pork tenderloin.

Doing my best to remain unrepentant.

Slept very poorly, when woken by alarm clock, felt sicker than I had in days, scratched work & went back to sleep.

Finally woke up a short time ago, thick headed, having some ginger ale.

Busy evening, probably too busy for one such as me, still shaking off cold. Beer & BBQ thing at the H & O, forgot how much I liked those ribs, really delightful, also spicy mac 'n' cheese, etc., etc.

After that, benefit show in Florence, somehow all the bands I least wanted to see played first, then we got tired & came home.

Going to read my scifi novel, I think.

Decided, once again, that what I should really be doing is going through Deleuze's Cinema books again & trying to come up with a manageable viewing list to accompany reading them. Once again having difficulty locating my copy of Cinema 2, did however come across my copies of Story of the Eye & the Fugs' first album, both of which I had mentioned to L. recently, the Fugs thing because of the Blake poem, of course.

It is perhaps trite to remark that canons, literary & otherwise, are, for the most part, simple artifacts of a lack of time which present themselves as products of a more or less total investigation- it might seem that this could somehow be avoided, perhaps with appropriate disclaimers, but I think this is a mistake.

Nice lazy day, L.'s listening to Randy Newman upstairs.

Strange, heavy weather, must be the hurricane drifting by.

Slept for a very long time, slowly feeling better. Still very congested.

Finally getting through that Frege, that period still mystifies me, why they all found their newly discovered logics the most obvious things in the world, fit for explaining everything else. Guess that's how it is with new things often.

Lower back hurts, wishing I had a hot tub.

Pickles hurt his foot on the train tracks earlier, he seems fine now. After the incident, walking down the sidewalk, an intense déjà vu- "...Pickles hurt his foot...Pickles hurt his foot...Pickles hurt his foot..."- all down the echoing corridors.

L. was giving me a hard time over my use of direct address in this, but you don't have a problem with it, do you? Let me know.

Reading Norstrilia again, a copy I picked up at the West Tisbury dump, first edition paperback. Book seems strangely relevant, I expect in ways idiosyncratic to me, but maybe you'd like it.

We picked up some records at record fair, listening to The Association.

Before that, we went for dim sum.

Who would want to buy an invisible temple, anyhow?

Itchy head, L.'s watching a movie in her laptop.

Want to go buy records.

Just watched Mulholland Drive again.

A little while ago, I was sitting on the back porch, watching the light on the rain, smoking, thinking about the idea of safety, of being safe.

My feet are icy cold.

Made some spicy chicken noodle, made me feel a lot better.

Watched the rest of Lincoln, pretty goofy, favorite thing about it was corrupt Rhode Island general/politician's accent, reminiscent of Gangs of New York.

Nose is clogging back up.

The folks made it home.

Seems I no longer have a fever, anyway.

Damp pajamas, damp outside, too.

Dogs want attention.

The brave lady's gone out to catch some music, good on her.

Me, I just went downstairs to get some water, started shivering uncontrollably. Back in the safety of blanket now.

Came home a bit early, since then, mostly prone.

L. brought me some pizza.

Somebody sent us a record player.

Ended up getting nice Chinese hot pot instead of soup, pretty close, super hot baby bok choy seemed called for.

Anyway, feel somewhat better, but certainly not good, wonder when I can get out of here?

Wondering why it seems that whenever there is any sort of emergency or unusual busyness at work, I have a cold.

Really want to go get some soup, been too busy to go get soup.

Soup, soup, soup.

One advantage of this head cold is a heavy, dreamless sleep.

Wish I had some chicken noodle.

A slight fog this morning, without & within.

Pickles is pushing against my hip.

Found myself feeling sicker & sicker as the day wore on, then for a little late day excitement, our corporate antivirus decided to go bananas.

Finally got out, picked up some maki & came home.

Just walked & fed the impatient dog, planning to spend the rest of the evening wrapped in a blanket, am therefore going to miss pal's monthly music & more extravaganza, bummer.

All sorts of worries in my peripheral vision, rear view mirror, road ahead seems clear enough, anyway.

Too sleepy to do my job properly, don't much care.

Could use a refreshing lemonade, will probably have one in a little while.

Have I mentioned how adorable Alice is?

Anyway, A is for Adorable Alice.

Ten hours of sleep didn't help as much as one might think, still helpful, L. & I both have minor cold symptoms.

Pressing on.

One of the many things accomplished yesterday while rushing here and there was the purchase of a new pair of shoes, going to slip those on & take a walk with Peretz.

A little more coffee first.

Thought I was exhausted yesterday, am now genuinely exhausted.

Feeling a bit the worse for wear, going to go try to catch a glimpse of Alice, then take our friend Chris to his mom's in Pittsfield, after that is anybody's guess. Maybe a little outlet shopping? Dinner with the folks later?

OK, OK.

Wow, fun party.

Sang a lot of karaoke, for me, anyway- "Come Dancing", "Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft", "Remember You're a Womble", "Ask", "My Little Red Book"- pretty representative sampling, I guess.

Pretty exhausted.

Went & got desserts, had some scotch poured into me.

Going to take a shower & then go face the music.

Full house, my brother's playing Guitar Hero, L. went & got donuts.

Need to go run dessert fetching errand shortly.

Cloudy & gray, should clear out later.

Too many people to pay attention to, therefore failing to pay adequate attention.

Will sleep now & try harder tomorrow.

Just back from yet another delightful brunch & a quick trip to the Bookmill, going to take my brother swimming in Green River now.

Beautiful, balmy day, quite perfect as last day's of summer go.

Up early for no good reason.

Cold & foggy, Peretz was shivering out in the yard.

Immediate family arrived yesterday, more folks on their way.

Made quiche, shredded more financial documents.

Lovely cool day, should probably walk the dog.

Having some coffee with sweetened condensed milk, thinking about making quiche.

Relatives start arriving today.

Itchy eye, was cold, am now excessively warm.

Done with work, collapsed in a heap.

Tried to meet up with spouse for hot dogs, cart MIA, got pizza with hot peppers & bacon instead.

Pleasantly cool.

Floors are cold, really should get myself some warm slippers suitable for the navigation of steep stairs.

Maybe fleece socks?

L.'s singing down the hall.

Pretty drastically tired, can't fall asleep, been sleeping poorly all week.

It's a strange thing to have someone else's nightmares, graveyards, ladybugs, etc., etc., etc. Had always had plenty of my own about being held down.

Anyway, pretty pointless, it's not as if my taking them on as well is any help. Just impressionable, I guess. Suppose it gives me a sort of feeling of distant solidarity, but frankly, at this point, I'd rather have sleep.

Oh well, Samsara & all that.

Went & got a burger at our favorite place, then caught a little pop music.

It's going to be a cold night, frost maybe.

It's funny, have had way too much to do this week, have spent lots of time preoccupied with strange irrelevancies. Not that that's unusual, just funny.

The darkness seems to be coming on faster than it should, rushing along. The cold, too.

Could use something to eat.

Blah, blah, blah, work, blah, blah, blah.

My parents are on their way.

Tum tiddly tum, tum tum.

Slept very poorly, woke in desperate need of coffee.

It seems to me that language, from an evolutionary viewpoint, is something like a rudimentary eye.

Got home, did some dishes, made us little Polish plates (no golumpki, sadly). Since then have been pretty collapsed.

TV, TV.

Peretz says I'm a bore.

Desperate urges to get away from this desk & do my grocery shopping. Pups need kibble, humans beverages.

Seems particularly cold & bleak in here today, tiny patch of autumnal color visible through the distant window.

Centering myself with the hum of the proxy server.

Learned this morning that rescheduled musical debut, earlier this week celebrated as convenient for me, was likely rescheduled due to sudden & untimely death of fellow Hampshire alum, bummer.

After hearing about this, headed home to moodily munch leftover pasta while watching the dogs play in the yard. On the way to my car, saw Harriet chasing a swift rabbit.

Colder than normal at my desk today. Blanket?

At work doing other people's work, just got call from L., sonhos are go, ho, ho, ho.

Mysterious foot pain.

Lawn workers got done with their horrible grinding noises just as I was leaving for work, typisch für September.

After work, yesterday devolved into a seemingly endless series of mundane tasks, still didn't get everything I wanted done.

Loud garden equipment noises through my window, finding it hard to type.

Workday proving less tedious than the recent norm, actual technical problems encountered, etc.

Need to remember to purchase coffee filters.

Woke up, started feeding dogs, found we were out of coffee filters. Made one pot with paper towel, turned out ridiculously weak, trying again.

Watching the shadows on my wall.

Beautiful cool morning, would very much like to spend it lazing about with dogs & wife, oh well.

Rushed home from work to walk the dogs before hurrying down to Fitchburg State to catch Ben Katchor, some medical necessities needed to be attended to first, got stuck behind a mysteriously slow Explorer on 2, parking was hard to come by on campus, somehow we arrived right on time.

Funny, touching stuff, stilted & unhip academic context also funny & touching in its old, own way. Pro forma introductions, questions desperately plucked from the bottoms of little, untried souls. Little corners where one keeps the sort of questions one asks again & again that no one seems able to answer. It's because they're lousy questions, kids.

L. asked some good ones anyway, found out that musical she wanted to see in NYC late fall would probably be postponed, would likely be available at MassMoCA first, which, to my ears anyway, was lovely news.

Went & got some very acceptable grinders from a Sal's Pizza after, then drove home to a soundtrack less satisfactory than the one we had going.

Just took the dogs for a long walk, shine on, harvest moon.

Headache continues.

Much nicer out, anyway.

Twitching eyelid.

That people don't understand the first thing about signs, or the next, or the next, a hard pill to swallow, again and again.

Read another trite rehearsal of the superiority of discursive reason over imagination earlier, the written word as such vs. TV & splashy magazines, reheated McLuhan with an axe to grind, no sense of history, at least not an honest one, oh ick, ick, ick.

Cool abstraction provides a pleasing illusion of subtlety & depth, of freedom. Among other things.

That the viewer knows next to nothing about how the pictures work on them is no reflection on pictures, words were once like this, examples are easy to come by.

Abracadabra.

Think headache's died back, then I try to stand up, yikes.

Right eye's gone wonky.

Should've done laundry.

Headachily reading more reviews, maybe thinking the nausea provoked will dispel this headache- what is substance anyway? Stuff and nonsense, stuff and nonsense. The real, the significant, the this, the that. It's all what we like, whoever that is.

A blighted, alien landscape. Slouching, squid-like, ominous smiles. Not like I need to tell you.

Fuck it, watching The Punisher.

Hurricane remnants drifting through = one hell of a sinus headache. Wishing there were something comfortingly entertaining on TV.

Peretz is looking at me quizzically, his head resting on the comforter. Now he's stopped.

Poor David Foster Wallace, poor everybody.

All of us in the same boat, to the extent we think much about it anyway, another one overboard, crap.

Feeling damp & wretched, been doing some light duty cleaning in preparation for next weekend's guests.

Worry, pity, relief that it's not really my problem, it's where I'm at, more often than not.

Funny show tunes emanating from upstairs, an emblem of always, among so many others.

Not sure what to do with myself, have a cigarette, maybe.

Yeay, brunch!

Hazy, muggy day has me feeling funny.

Maybe more sleep.

Went to see jazz at Bookmill, sold out, sat around outside chatting with Andy & René, very pleasant.

After, went to Northampton for karaoke & work, means I can sleep in tomorrow, hip, hip.

Wagon Wheel lunch, also got a belated birthday cake in Turners, party never ends.

It's nap time.

Was going to go stock up on local soda for party & also place an order for Portuguese donuts, think I lack the energy, will have to work all that in later, I guess.

Just stubbed my toe rescuing a sock from Peretz.

Wavy beach, skee ball, sushi boat- what more could one want?

Very little, honestly, a picture of contentment, illustrated for your convenience.

I love a rainy night.

Sleepy, can't fall asleep, getting up early for more fun.

Forgot to mention we watched One, Two, Three yesterday, that's always a good one for gauging my overall mental state. Please send more weirdly dated overly frenetic farces, Netflix.

Pickles is snoring, the lucky dog.

Weekend fun's begun with dog walk up to Poet's Seat followed by tasty bar snacks. Pop music next.

Going to get up early & head to the beach, skee ball also a likely bet. Looking forward to prizes.

OK, 1, 2, 3.

Itching to get out of work & on with my weekend.

Spent much of day fooling around with virtual machine to no great purpose, pretty great.

Beautiful & sunshiny out, cold & dim within.

Cold, cold, cold. Hot coffee.

Hard to leave the blankets.

Things are sort of rushing along, muddling through.

Just made the mistake of reading a few book reviews- all arduously, laughably authoritative. The pose of mature sensibility so beloved of journalists, as with so much else, hard to say whether the ridiculous or the revolting dominates. People of fucking taste & judgment.

So, as you can see, feeling a bit better.

L. made some spaghetti for dinner which she, I gather, didn't care much for, but I thoroughly enjoyed. Garlic, garlic, garlic.

It's a chilly night, have put on my pajamas to face it bravely.

Still feeling woozy.

Went for walk with dogs, very nice out.

Checked with mechanic, still no sensible route to fixing my car, argh.

Home sick. Sick, sick, sick. Tummy trouble.

Actually feeling a bit better at this point, hurray.

Since coming home a little early, been feeling icky on & off, having a pretty good time regardless.

Should probably go to sleep, feeling a bit too icky.

Archiving ads, feeling nauseated, would like to go home now, please.

Maybe once done with these ads?

Ads, ads, ads.

Cold, gray morning, stomach hurts, probably that late night call from work.

Tempted to just go back to sleep, then maybe get up around noon and make myself english muffins & chicken soup.

Will, instead, continue with my daily rounds.

Lazing about, bad scifi on the TV, what's not to like?

Could use a beverage.

Love an early show, lots of music, now home resting, bars are stupid.

Talked to my mom for a bit, sounds like her grant's more or less in order & ready to go, happy about that.

Happy about lots of stuff.

Having a rough time getting going, had a rough night.

Rough, rough.

No idea what's going to be happening at work this week, probably best.

Should really get my car fixed.

Back to roasting vegetables, must be nearly fall.

Reprised sage pesto fusilli with roasted squash & apple, thought of The Lady Eve.

L. made brownies.

All in all, pretty idyllic.

Don't feel like going to work in the morning.

Walked the dogs, then went & met K. for brunch. After, went & took pictures, graveyard, train yard.

Back to the cool breezes.

Slow start, cool breezes.

Would like to get out & take some photos today.

It's a very wet night.

Just back from taking the dogs out for a brief promenade, lovely out despite the rain, pleasant clean air, striking reflections from street lamps in the streams on the sidewalks and pavements.

Arch Street is closed, the arch is flooded.

Before that, finished watching The Lord of the Rings, adore sentimental claptrap, I do, I do.

Earlier, made some pasta with an alfredo sauce, with a side of local tomatoes in a simple vinaigrette.

Picked up some photos I'd ordered, ordered a festive lemon cake, did some work.

Can keep going further back, all the way into the abyss if I like- it's somewhat burdensome, freedom of movement, can get a bit vertiginous. In any case, has its good points, wouldn't trade it.

Out in the rain, and even before, listening to it, thinking rainy day thoughts, worries, pities, other days, rainy & otherwise.

Find myself feeling stretched a bit thin, then snap right back into shape, slip on a hoodie & get on with it.

Terse & telegraphic, ai ai ai.

Damp morning.

Coffee is my friend.

Lovely dinner of snacks, got a one eyed doll & some buttons at craft fair, socialized with chums.

Once home again, ate some fancy ice cream while watching many, many orcs get slaughtered.

Still unpleasantly warm, will probably sleep poorly.

Have a cramp in my lower back, another in my style, should probably sort those out. Hot shower, maybe.

On back porch with dogs, enjoying breeze, waiting to head out for adventures. I love a laptop.

Big yawn.

Lots of butterflies in the yard.

Lovely lazy day, made some scrambled eggs with leftover sauteed vegetables. Going to go get some bar snacks in a bit, then head south for craft fair.

Too darn hot.

Lazy belated Labor Day, L.'s home too, not feeling too well.

Craft fair in Northampton later, may go order a cake en route.

No RSVPs today.

Those fried doughs with maple cream are quite something.

L. rode the Freak Out, I was too tall.

Feet hurt, sweaty, etc.

Just back from parade, dog walk, then fair.

Too darn hot.

Got called assholes by old lady for crossing at crosswalk, a charming town.

Took a nap, seem to have become much more nap oriented of late.

Out on the back porch with dogs & mosquitos.

Need to go buy cat food.

Parade, parade.

Hello, long weekend, long time, no see.

Began the festivities with a kielbasa reuben, parade & fair on tap for later. Hip, hip.

Had a nice little dinner get together, followed immediately by a Pickles escape with all the usual drama, plus a batty old lady complete with motorized wheelchair & service dog threatening to sue us, calling the cops on me, etc. Big fun. Cop was pretty nice about it, anyway.

Finally we recovered Pickles & all had cake. The end.

Relaxing under cooling fan.

Drugged feeling persists, hugs not drugs, hugs not drugs.

Work is being goofy, but not in a charming way.

Sounds like more cookery later, may be a new trend.

Having a Dr. Pepper as the opening salvo of my campaign to feel less sedated.

Thinking ruefully of the pervading stupidity, seeps into everything. Bored with it.

Want more fun.

The morning Frege's been being good to me, anyway. Sinn, Bedeutung, etc., etc.

Sleep's not wanting to let me go this morning, wish I could accommodate.

Sleep, sleep, sleep.

OK, should shower.

Made some steak & sauteed vegetables for dinner, pretty easy, still got all sweaty, probably why I haven't been cooking much lately.

Anyway, juicy peppery goodness.

Peretz just spilled a drink, the decadence.

Apparently even twelve hours of sleep can't prevent me from feeling drowsy at work.

Went & walked across the street for a coffee a while ago & experienced ecstatic sunshiny moment, warm & pleasant, warm & pleasant.

Want a burger.

Slept for a very long time, haven't done that for quite a while, was lovely.

Pickles is licking my comforter.

BBQ = good times, a bit sleepy to fully appreciate, had several hot dogs, some cake, etc.

Going to take a nap.

Peretz has the runs, probably down to all the time we were away yesterday shuttling the kid about. He worries.

Was funny spending all that time driving along the coast with none spent at the seaside.

Did get an Italian Bomb from Modern Apizza, amazing thing, that. Going to have a leftover piece in a minute, I think.

It's Labor Day, so, naturally, I need to go to work.

Once done with that, bbq & wiffle ball like everybody else.

Relating the interpretation of mundane jottings such as these to the log monitoring & analysis I do professionally, establish a baseline, note variations, alerts, etc. All very humdrum.

Gazing glazedly through my blinds. When's naptime?

Just back from stoking the fires of pure reason with another delightful brunch.

We've got a long drive ahead of us, preparing myself mentally.

Peretz is asleep beside me, chin on his paws.

Sunday morning laundry.

Head full of projects, will have time for those sometime.

Sipping coffee.

Went & used up accumulated gift certificates, did some work.

Feeling very low energy, hand hurts.

Enjoying a cool breeze.

Slowly being led to the conclusion that trying to be nice to people isn't worth the effort. Good work, folks, thanks for the heads up.

What a vile world this is.

Listening to the wind, crickets.

Took a nap, woke to heavy air, headache, damp.

Went to store, bought bulk sundries, kielbasa links to make tomorrow.

Feeling overtaxed.

Right after I got to my desk, little old lady came in & asked me, "I just sent 10 over & nothing's happening at the other end. Can you help me?"

Turns out it was a printer problem. Should've guessed.

Hand's throbbing unpleasantly. Peretz has chewed his butt sore again, poor little guy.

I've started rereading The Foundations of Arithmetic in the bathroom mornings, clearing my head out nicely.

Clear headed & affectionate is really the only worthwhile way to approach the world, wish I could maintain that more easily.

Coffee, as with so many other things, helps.

Looking forward to tossing another workweek into the dustbin of history.

Obscure & irritable, sorry, sorry, stupid of me, I know.

Stabbed myself in the palm opening a plastic tub of licorice, then headed over to local Democratic party spectacular over at our favorite restaurant.

Place was chock full of beaming, gleeful fanatics. L. says they just want to believe things can be better, I don't know, religion makes me feel sad & sick inside.

There were, however, some delicious free snacks.

Another bleary-eyed morning of spam perusal, could use more coffee.

Thinking it may be time for some aesthetic principles beyond mere aggregation.

Also another day of working at 3 locations, gets old.

Got home so hungry was staggering a bit, made some pasta with cognac cream sauce with onions & Outlook chorizo as quickly as possible, now feel much better.

Likeness, facsimile, simulacrum.

Etc., etc.

Oy.

A few more RSVPs arrived today & a birth announcement. Life goes on, or so they say.

Today's proving to be amusingly technical, all sorts of technical stuff. Yip, yip!

Didn't manage to eat lunch, sadly.

Excited for the Brain Exchange later.

Back from Transperformance, guess I'd say U2 was the high point, though I've never much cared for them. Nadir would have to be the Guns 'N' Roses. Wished T. Rex had done "Chariot Choogle" & XTC "Statue of Liberty". Can't always get what you want. Was very pleased that ELO did "Mr. Blue Sky", which played over our exit, there was a strange moment just as we were leaving, though, where the vocals seemed to slip radically out of key, was strange, couldn't tell if it was in my head or what. All the times I listened to that song off 45 when I was 7 or whatever, hard to think of it as existing out in the world, outside of my head.

Anyway, anyway.

After the show, tried the newly reopened Paradise City Tavern, burger was pretty decent, but you'd think for the ten dollars or so they charged for it, they could buy local tomatoes.

The drive home was characterized by each driver near me doing some typical annoying thing, like living in a textbook, ick.

Need sleep.

Sitting at my desk at work, moodily sipping coffee. It's getting very difficult to schedule anything here.

Foot is improving anyway.

Trying to figure out money stuff.

Really didn't want to leave my cozy bed, finally did, dog & coffee routine complicated by Pickles desire to shoot out the door like a bullet, Pickles entangling himself in his line, etc., etc. Peretz was a perfect gentleman.

Have returned to bed with coffee, is going to be hard to leave again.

Came home from work, made spicy mac 'n' cheese, brought it & jalapeño & cheese kielbasa over to bbq at pals' house. Lots of friendly folks & tasty food in attendance, people seemed to like the mac 'n' cheese. Met with a variety of small to medium sized dogs.

Feels great to be home & off my feet. Peretz is arranging the blanket to suit.

A Fistful of Dollars is on. How much havoc can one man wreak?

Car's not yet fixed, mechanic's still searching for part, argh!

In other news, my left foot hurts like the bejeezus.

Having a Dr. Pepper.

Long, strange night, tossing & turning, sore muscles, dreams of photographs, conversations with absent people, etc.

Wonder if my car is fixed?

Just back from being at the Vineyard longer than expected, a tiring but good time. After some initial confusion struggling through fireworks hungry multitudes in Oak Bluffs, things went pretty smoothly. Kid's band is surprisingly good, Gay Head even lovelier than anticipated, the West Tisbury Fair, while not up to the standard set by the Cummington one, still pretty nice, drunk college students still as annoying as always, human psychology still a big letdown, etc., etc.

Today so far has been mostly travel, had enough of that for a bit, I think. Going to go fetch the pups shortly.

Just took steps to prevent a server going south over the weekend, should really take a shower.

Itchy, sneezy, dopey, grumpy.

Oooooooom-ray.

Didn't sleep very well, woke around 4 having a severe allergic reaction to something, spent about half an hour coughing & sneezing, never did get back to proper sleep.

Feeling a bit sluggish.

Looks to be a lovely, lovely day.

Feeling very sedate, if not sedated.

Went out for some Chinese noodle's & Dirty Bill's karaoke.

Looking forward to brief island holiday. Love those.

Home again, collapsed in a heap. Self-consciousness taken to its logical conclusion.

Ah, the wife's home.

Was just, rather than doing work, reading a trite web article about the decline of villainy in popular media. Wasn't that interesting, basically in favor of unexplained harsh viciousness, not getting any argument from me about that. Did find some of the comments in favor of subtler, psychologized villains sort of thought-provoking, if misguided. Like so much else associated with realism, these sort of preferences tend to distract from how things actually are, people being, after all, mostly stereotypes, the subtle reader seeking subtle characters being one such.

Plausible explanations, verisimilitude, etc., etc.

I say it's spinach & I say the hell with it. Beats working.

Amusingly technical problems to deal with this morning, a welcome change.

Pay dispute with workplace more or less sorted out, fact that I can anticipate other such disputes makes me wish I had a different workplace.

Made arrangements to get car sorted out, that will occur while I am away playing on the Vineyard.

So, slowly sorting things out, could use a more efficient sort algorithm.

Going to head out to lovely fish 'n' chip shop for lunch with our web developer in a bit.

Had a pretty nice evening, made bacon cheeseburgers, Roma came by & had one, watched more Olympics, etc., etc.

Not feeling much like going to work.

Out my window, squealing tires. Really need to do something about my car.

Pickles's enthusiastic nesting just knocked my laptop out of my hands.

Went & got a burrito, mood slightly improved.

Lovely outside, stupid & tiresome in.

La la la, la, la la, la la.

Finally fell asleep. Woke up feeling cold, Olympic gymnast being interviewed on the TV, constant stupid leading questions designed to satisfy a prefabricated narrative, what else is new?

People want to make everybody else players in their story. It's a drag.

Long pause, sipping coffee.

Wish I could make it stop.

In an unpleasant panic state, would like to be asleep, am going to go have a cigarette, then curl up & shake for a while.

Crap.

Was going to make burgers, ended up going out for soup & salad, burgers tomorrow.

Very sleepy, bats squeaking outside making me nervous, watching Olympics.

Nice cool breeze, soon, fall.

Got so sleepy at work, decided it would be safer to drive home before I got any sleepier.

No sign of bats.

Bat invasion continued through the night, didn't sleep very well, feeling a bit ragged & on edge, disposed of two bat cadavers in the morning, one of which L. bagged with Pickles in the night, the other killed by Peretz/Pickles tag team in my room as I was getting ready to leave for work.

Wish those bats were smart enough to just steer clear.

Drinking some coffee at my icy desk, feeling icy & distant.

A variety of things, not just bats, colluding to stress me out, ongoing pay dispute at work, ongoing ridiculous hostile(?) monitoring (honestly, what's the point?), worrying about paying for car repairs, etc., etc.

Could use a snack.

Just back from celebration of little Magdalena's 2nd birthday. Good times.

Apart from the bat hiding behind my bookcase, anyway.

Turned on godawful classic rock radio morning show in an attempt to get "You're Gonna Miss Me" out of my head, didn't really work until they played "Bad Company".

Going to be a sleepy day at work. Fingers hurt from yesterday's potatoing.

Going to check through the weekend's spam now.

Got a ride from Neil to noise show at the Elevens, pretty nice music & several people seemed genuinely happy to see me. Learned that favorite fish 'n' chip shop is now only open Thursday-Saturday, drag, but at least it's still open.

Spent most of the show being too sleepy, finally had the bright idea of getting a coke, perked me up a bit, but not really enough.

On the ride home, talked with Neil about movies, he wishes he could open a theater, like most simple dreams involving bringing joy to others, probably unfulfillable.

Took a nap, returned call to my cousin Bess who had called while I was chopping potatoes to discuss accommodation options. Lower back hurts a bit from too long at too low counter. Should really walk Peretz.

Just back from four hours of doing my best impression of a potato chopping machine.

Peretz is licking my elbow, doubtless delightfully starchy.

Trying very hard to be awake enough to go do food prep. It's a challenge.

Peretz is looking out the window, should take him for a walk.

Coffee, coffee.

Muscles hurt.

Stumbled my way downstairs, had a drink, a snack, let the dog out.

Sat on the back porch watching him sniff around, thinking about ecology as a game for the privileged, feeling old & tired.

Lovely moon tonight.

Went & hung with Neil & Faf, checked their artspace, walked to Wagon Wheel for sundaes, played a little frisbee.

Got home all tuckered out, L.'s gone to Northampton for karaoke & a show. A lot of energy, that one.

Made some spicy sausage & onion sandwiches with a side of broccoli raab, thinking about new soda flavors.

Should probably really ditch this IT crap & open a soda shop.

Sleepy again.

Pretty idyllic morning, went to the co-op for donuts, curried chicken salad, tomatoes & sourdough bread, then stood around the kitchen drinking coffee & snacking.

At work now, waiting for servers to finish rebooting & C.

Feeling better, remarkable how much fifteen or so hours of sleep can help.

Eating yogurt covered raisins & malted milk balls with my coffee.

Feeling tired blurred into feeling ill, dizzy, upset stomach, took a nap, woke up, still feeling woozy, had a ginger ale, watched some Olympics, pb & j on a sesame roll. Lying down again, feeling pretty wretched.

Busy weekend, work tomorrow, helping with harvest supper Sunday, hope I feel better.

So sleepy that on the drive home from picnic one of my eyes was watering.

Going to have a little quiet time now.

Last night, after L. finally got home, we went for nice dinner at the H & O, interesting peach infused bourbon drink on special, fries better than usual, people very nice as always.

After that, headed to Dirty Bill's for a little of their famous Thursday night karaoke, L. sang "Jesse's Girl", I did "Behind Blue Eyes", not half as creepy as I'd hoped. L. won a free drink ticket which I used to get a scotch & soda. Some lady sang an amazingly tone deaf rendition of "Wind Beneath My Wings".

Stayed up far too late watching gymnastics, paying for that now.

Need to shower, take poor Peretz for his shot & go to work. Then, company picnic at Look.

'He a string of pearls gave to her,
Smooth and polished, pied and purple.
Round her snowy neck she placed them
With no thought of harm or cunning;
And with simple, maiden speeches
Filled the time as they sped onward.
To each pearl had Chi-co chanted,
Each had bathed in mystic water,
Each held fast the same weird power,
Till the time grew ripe for evil.
On the waves they could not harm her,
There the Sea-King ruled them ever;
But when on the shore she landed
They would work their evil mission.
On the shore of Ro-a-no-ak
Chi-co sent his boat with vigor.
Lithe and happy she sprang shoreward,
When,— from where her foot first lightly
Pressed the sand with human imprint,—
On— away— towards the thicket,
Sprang a White Doe, fleet and graceful.
His revenge thus wrought in safety,
Drifting seaward Chi-co chanted:
"Go, White Doe, hide in the forest,
Feed upon the sweet wild-grasses;
No winged arrow e'er shall harm you,
No Red Hunter e'er shall win you;
Roam forever, fleet and fearless,
Living free and yet in fetters."
O fair maiden! born and nurtured
Neath the shadow of disaster!
Isle of Fate was Ro-a-no-ak,
In the Land-of-Wind-and-Water.
Nevermore to fill with gladness
The sad heart of stricken mother;
Nevermore to hear the wooing
Of the brave and true O-kis-ko.
Gone thy charm of youthful beauty,
Gone thy sway o'er savage natures;
Doomed to flee before the hunter,
Doomed to roam the lonely island,
Doomed to bondage e'en in freedom.
Is the seal of doom eternal?
Hath the mussel-pearl all power?
Cannot love thy fetters loosen?'

Just sayin'.